Archive → December, 2011
Post-Christmas Shopping

Christmas shoppers. Mad, aren’t they? Crowding the shops in the three or four days before Christmas in order to buy last-minute presents for loved-ones and random tat for the forced jollity of the office Secret Santa.
Makes sense though. It’s Christmas. You’ve got to buy that stuff.
Likewise, the supermarkets are hell-on-earth for the duration of the run-up to Christmas. Full of people with trolleys piled high with meat, with cheeses, with vegetables and snacks. And a few more in case friends come around. And pensioners buying eighty-seven loaves of bread, because Doris might pop around and she likes a bit of toast and the shops are closed on Christmas day.
They’re open on Boxing Day though. And they’re packed.
With the same people.
They’re piling into the supermarkets to buy yet more food of the Christmassy variety, because although the cupboards and fridge are stuffed, this lot is all reduced! As it’s short-dated.
And there’s still room in the freezer for another loaf of bread in case Doris pops around. She liked a bit of toast when she was alive.
I don’t get supermarket shoppers on Boxing Day. Sure, if you NEED something, it might make sense to go. But if you can do without for another day or two, why would you leave the house for something as mundane as filling the coffers of Tesco and Asda on a day when by rights your belly should be the size of Piers Morgan’s lies? When you can barely move without farting in such a way that your anus sounds like Piers Morgan?
I can understand sales shoppers; people going for a proper bargain. Some massively reduced clothes, electronics or something. But you can do without five kilograms of sausage meat for 38p. Can’t you?
Of course you can.
There’s a good film on. Sit down and watch it.
Or go to the park and burn off some of the turkey and that. You’ve got to eat more of it later.